The Dance

Labor is a beautiful dance between a woman and her body. Every surge is another spin, another step, another movement closer to bringing baby forth. It's filled with moments requiring tremendous strength, patience, and surrender.

Oftentimes in labor, there's a moment when the dance becomes a little too much. It feels a little too hard. The next step impossible. It doesn't matter if you visualized this dance for months, stretched and strengthened your body to overcome the steps, or even if this is your third time, there's often a moment (or more) you're not sure you can fathom another surge. You don't know what your next move is, and you can't imagine making the decision on your own. Do you change positions even though you're so exhausted? Do you spiral, break down, and sobL? Do you call for the epidural you so desperately wanted to avoid?

This is the moment your support team is integral. Someone who knows your deepest desires regarding birth, who is unabashedly for you, and willing to step into your dance and take the lead untill you're ready to carry yourself on your own again. This person can look you in the eye with a quiet calm, a steadying presence, and cue you on your next move.

It looks like this:

Woman laboring in bathtub with the help of a birthing support person.

The birthing mother has been in labor for many hours. She's exhausted from the dance that hasn't given her a break. Her surges are strong, steady, and beginning to feel endless. She doesn't know what to do, how to keep moving forward. Her doula knows her heart is to stay in her home and have an unmedicated birth. A hospital transfer is only for the utmost emergency. Her birth team has determined the baby is handling labor well, though mom is tiring and losing her motivation. The doula grabs a banana, looks mom in the eyes, and instructs her to take a bite of banana and then take some deep calming breaths. Mom takes the banana but starts to spiral as another surge washes her away. Again, the doula looks mom in the eye, grabbing her hands. She softly speaks to her, grounding her, "I am with you. You are not alone. Let's get through the next five surges together. I won't leave your side." The next surge tries to take her under, and the doula reminds her to breath deeply, and one breath at a time they get through the contraction together. Soon, mom is breathing her baby down, and the dance is near it's end. She births her baby at home without any intervention.

The power of another's presence who can anchor you and bring you back into the dance with your body is irreplaceable. The steady, unwavering strength and wisdom in someone who knows what you want, and has done the dance before is invaluable.

Make sure you have this person in your corner.